My half year period here is coming to an end. I've been through all the emotions as I've been here but I must say one of the things that I have enjoyed the most is the being home. In all my travels I've noticed that feeling at home has to be worked really hard on when one is in a foreign country. Language, food, perspectives and weather ... At least I didn't have to work on all those and besides, it is good to be here in the summer. The sun is just simply a natural cure for the blues whenever they threaten to take over. I'll miss that the most - the sun and it's products i.e. fruits, warm lake water, the need for light clothing and sandals. I know, I paint too bright a picture but with the sun's brightness today, I can't help but do that.
Today I moved out of my little house in the ''bundu". I loved the little thing, it was my first successful attempt ever at living on my own and ''calling the shots" - as it were. Eventually though, when all the calling of shots was done (writing schedules, entering fieldwork data, communicating with loved ones, reading etc.) I felt the need to leave. That's something I must leave behind - the leaving. Life is not neatly packaged into timelines and departure/arrival points. I am now with family but they have ''left" me in their own way. There are new traditions since I've been away. New visitors, new furniture, new food. As I hide in my corner groping for ways to fit in and ''call the shots'' in some ways - I realise that the only thing constant is the sun. Even other loved ones have left since I've been away, they have schedules of their own, food of their own and time of their own. While I was calling my shots, I left them behind. Now returning to where I left them, they are gone. I must occupy myself again: I was instructed to rest today so that I must do and get back to the business of things. Leave again, in my mind, in my brain because after all, for the past so many hours - I am here but not here. They are here but not here. We are only bound by our hearts and the bonds that unite us...as family, as loved ones.
So, with new schedules and realities, the day must go on. Meeting new people... leaving off to somewhere....and accepting that others have ''left". With good fortune, I'll catch up with someone or something today. If all else fails, at least the sun shines.